Between Two Dugouts – Kurt Mensching
PhilCoke’sBrain: On today’s brilliantly orginial episode of Between Two Dugouts we welcome none other than The Übermensch himself, BlessYouBoys.com headmaster Kurt Mensching. If you have never heard of BlessYouBoys.com you’ve probably stumbled here drunkenly and are lost. Just go back home and go to bed and sleep it off. Anyway, Kurt, I understand that you live in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula, have you always hated people or have you recently become a hermit?
Kurt: I mostly grew up in northern Michigan, then later moved to Marquette. Marquette is hardly the Upper Peninsula, it just happens to be a short driving distance from it. But if anyone tries to find me unannounced, I’m armed to the teeth. So don’t surprise me.
PhilCoke’sBrain: Miss Teen South Carolina and such as thinks you might need a map. But don’t worry, I’ll announce my arrival so you can pack the black powder and ram in the minieball down the ol’ flintlock.
I know you usually go by the handle MackAveKurt. I understand this is because Mack Avenue is where most of your hoes worked. Tell us, how do you like to keep your pimp hand strong?
Kurt: Daily workouts with the ban hammer. Speaking of which, this interview had better go well, Mr. Brain.
PhilCoke’sBrain: Um..sorry Mr. Thor, I’ll clean it up.
On a happier note, many of us have heard about your dog Donner and seen his photos. He seems like a really nice dog! This isn’t a question. Moving right along. Who is your favorite associate editor at BlessYouBoys? Don’t be a wuss, pick one.
Kurt: I’m going to say Alli, because she’s the only one who gives short answers when Al forces us to do podcasts. (Just kidding, we all willingly show up to listen to Tokarz’s 10 minute answers and Matt Wallace’s 10 minute pauses between words.)
PhilCoke’sBrain: Is it true that Tigerdog1 is actually just the name of a computer program designed to populate the Internet with Tigers related facts and opinions?
Kurt: Yeah. That’s actually Tigerdog 1.0. Just you wait until we debut the 2.0 version this season!
PhilCoke’sBrain: Sources say there is a photo of you on the Internet wearing a Orioles cap. Confess, you’ve tipped pitches to Luke Scott haven’t you?!
Kurt: Orioles? God no. I do sport a nice Hanshin Tigers hat. I’ve only recently decided I didn’t curse Detroit by putting it on.
PhilCoke’sBrain: I really need better sources. Is Ian Cassleberry a real person? Do you ever feel like you are living in “his” or “its” shadow?
Kurt: Come to think of it, anyone who’s ever met Ian has disappeared from the blogosphere. I’m actually afraid of him at this point.
PhilCoke’sBrain: What’s with you and snow? Get a room already.
Kurt: If you’re going to put up with six months of winter, you may as well get a daily workout in shoveling it, I say.
PhilCoke’sBrain: Yeah, gotta get toned for those trips to the beach. *suppressed laughter* Do the authorities ever let you travel south of the bridge? How do we know you are real?
Kurt: I try to avoid going beneath the bridge. What the hell is down there anyway? A bunch of Meijer stores and the Fox Sports Detroit girls? No wonder everyone is leaving Michigan.
PhilCoke’sBrain: Good point, there is a good chance you could get exposed to an STD. Plus those Fox Sports girls have a questionable reputation as well.
Has editing BlessYouBoys made you insanely wealthy? Ilitch isn’t going to live forever, thoughts of succession?
Kurt: Wealthy? No. Cynical? Yes! Ilitch actually passed away in 2004, they’ve just been doing a weekend at Bernie’s bit with his body ever since.
PhilCoke’sBrain: What advice would you have for a young person who wants to live in the arctic and own a dog?
Kurt: You’ll be a lot happier as soon as you get the hell out of the city, hurry up and do it.
PhilCoke’sBrain: There you have it friends, hurry up and do it. Wise words indeed. A big thank you to Kurt. Follow him @BlessYouBoys on Twitter or visit BlessYouBoys.com where all swear words and nonsensical ranting is accepted and encouraged!
Be sure to tune in next time when I again interview someone super famous!
Good night and good luck.